the one that sings.

Stream, originally uploaded by mira_foto.

The Real Work

It may be that when we no longer know what to do
we have come to our real work,
and that when we no longer know which way to go
we have come to our real journey.
The mind that is not baffled is not employed.
The impeded stream is the one that sings.

- Wendell Berry

all that is not given is lost.

so there was this woman who called me at work to inquire about our homebound service...and it became apparent as she wandered through her questions [she was hoping to get a particular book before school began for her students to use in her classroom]...that she had recently found herself in the predicament of being [as she said]...handicapped [and then, she said...i don't like that word]...and i sensed her challenges to mobility were a new thing...and here she was on the phone with me...trying to find a way...still focused on something she obviously cared very much about [teaching]...because she only has transport, apparently, to the doctor and to work...and yet, she was trying, desperately, to find a way...to prepare for the coming school year...to do...what in the past, may have been so much easier...without thought or planning or consequence of being confined to [as she called it] this chair. and the minutes ticked on as she plied me with questions about everything...about our service...about the possibility of getting this book sent to her...about the possibility of having it sent to her local library if her son could pick it up...about how that process works...about our courier system...about how she would be notified...about how she could know what other items,titles,books could be available to her...and it was abundantly clear that for every question i answered, the possibilities were igniting a hundred other inquiries in her mind. and i realized i was glad, i could take the time...even though my head feels as though it is splitting open...and my blood sugar at 540 is forcibly closing my eyes and weighing on my chest making it hard to breathe...and i'm overwhelmed about not having a car, and all of the people i'm supposed to follow up with...but right now...in this moment...i'm in conversation with her...and i'm getting a sense of all the people she's talked to just to get to me...and how much time it's taken to get a simple question answered...and i feel that all of the ways i'm running up against a brick wall...is just a momentary experience of all of the challenges this woman has newly found herself in...and i'm humbled at the thought of this...at all i have...and, in this moment, though i've never met her, i can sense her pain...and i find myself leaning into all of her questions, and when i have negotiated all of the best ways i can be of service to her...she exclaims, "you know, i've talked to a lot of people today...and most people have been really mean...i mean, i know people are busy, but they have not been helpful...and i want to thank you, because you've been helpful...and you've taken your time...NO...MORE!! than helpful...and i'm really amazed at how much, how willingly you've helped me...i mean, it really makes a difference! you should know this."...and i don't tell her...and i hope she cannot hear it in my voice, that i'm about to cry...but i tell her with a hushed voice, "that. really means so...very much to me". and "you know, ms....[.......]....isn't it what this is all about? i mean, if you called, and i was rude to you, wouldn't i just really be having a more miserable day? and when we can stop and realize this is all we have...and it's infinitely more beautiful and rich because of the connections we can make with one another, than i have to tell you, honestly, that i am honoured because the pleasure is all mine." and it caused me to consider how often we live in our own heads...i honestly felt very weary picking up the phone...and being bombarded with questions was at this point...a physical and emotional challenge...but even as i am experiencing my own pain...in the moment i could make straight the path for this woman for whom so much has been pain of late...i also felt such a sweet joy. and it doesn't matter all of the ways i feel i lack right now...physically...financially...even emotionally [after so much unexpected transition, of late], i feel as though i am a wealthy, wealthy woman, indeed. rich in love. rich in spirit. [and isn't this all we really need?].

sunday evening - here comes monday morning - dreaming.

neuf semaines de découverte: finis ou vingt-trois.

and now, i've reached our 23rd thing, and so our journey draws nigh the end. with joy, i've ventured through each new week, and with joy i'd gladly do it again.

i'd have to say among the things we've explored as a group, i've firstly enjoyed the opportunity to document my progress as a blog...and thus have access to a more creative work process. beyond that, our exercises gave me the opportunity to explore rss feeds, podcasts, and other things i'd often seen, but never taken the time to pore through any explanation long enough to utilize the technology for myself.

i thoroughly enjoy my bloglines account...talk about a clean, easy way of keeping abreast of so, so much information...staying on top of the topics and blogs that interest me is now second nature.

so too is my de.licio.us account. [gentle reader, you should know, i'm the kind of nerdy soul who has a whole file cabinet devoted to folders of esoteric information like edible wild plants, and oliver sacks'-like case histories of neurological anomalies] this is quickly becoming an indispensable tool in my geeky learning-lovin' bag of tech tricks.

i sure could have used an online bookmarking site that time i lost my favorite calvin pelorian project link about the namennayo cats:

i imagine certain things like zoho writer will come in handy as i prepare to go back to school, but beyond any speculation, i know already, that having been given the structured imperative to explore, and the chance to play with a number of emerging technologies has deconstructed some the overwhelming mystery that had in the past caused me pause in learning new ways of doing things.

and so, to come full circle...and back to my first blog posting, and that 7 1/2 thing: it is play that has been my greatest teacher. in that light, i really liked this format. i'm so pleased we all were given the opportunity to work our way through and discover so much on our own.

on the other hand, if there could be any improvement, i know in my building alone, there were quite a few who have fallen behind because exploring in a virtual medium is not second nature to them...i'm proud of a good many around here, who at times, have asked me for help...and still ventured on their own to keep up. still...i think, if there is going to be a system-wide project...it might help to have the project's coordinators onsite at each location at least once to answer any questions along the way. i think each location's facilitators might have been a little overwhelmed with the number of staff who needed some assistance these last few weeks. maybe one sit-down session at each branch where everyone could ask their questions in a group and a little more time to work through [the final projects especially] could have been helpful.

lastly, if offered the chance to participate in another exploration project like this one, i'd be thrilled to! in all, it has been a great deal of fun for me...and i feel i've been given the chance to employ skills that will broaden my utility at work and continue to prove worthwile as the tide of technology shifts more toward a more virtual web 2.0 reality.

and so, the end, never sounded so good.
here's the song "23" - by blonde redhead

la neuvième semaine - 22e chose. [overdrive at pbclibrary: downloadable audiobooks]

well, i finally got around to perusing our own system's available e-books online. and noodled around a bit with the titles available through overdrive, and i'm glad i did...as i hadn't really explored much of what was available.

i wasn't able to download or listen to any titles on my pc, but it was curious to see that certain titles whose physical print copies were once in high demand are available online.

one thing that wasn't too clear to me [as a novice browser] on our system was, is there a waiting list for e-books? are there an indefinite number of copies for the audiobooks available? or do you have to wait, just like for hardcopies in the branches, for the digital copy to be returned by another patron?? [i noticed there were e-holds]...did i miss an online explanation for these issues?

lastly, i thought it was interesting [and this would pique my interest, because A} i'm geeky, and B} i work with a lot of activities directors at various nursing homes who are always looking for materials like this] that a lot of the old radio shows are available for download through overdrive's services.

so, if like me, family hour growing up meant gathering around for the latest episode of "The Shadow"...check out Lux's collection of "Fibber McGee and Molly"...or "The Best of Jack Benny" and spend an hour or so getting lost revisiting a simpler time.

a sweet, sweet duty, indeed.

photo by philip borges

"so what is it that you do?" you know that question that follows those moments of pregnant silence — making small talk at parties, sitting next to strangers on the plane, meeting your other's parents for the first time — how can you really quantify what comprises your day? it is not enough really to say, "i work for the library." people get the wrong idea about shushing, and tend to wrongly envision the whole 'librarian' thing. to explain sometimes that i am — not — a librarian is a confusing, moot point for some…rather, i like to say that what i do is something like social work…but for the library. how much easier it is to explain that i spend my days bringing and sending books to the people who need them most: the people who can't get to the library…the people who otherwise have virtually no contact with the outside world…and spend their days with the television for company…living such an interior world in their heads, that i can tell when they call me…and our conversations will take at times 12 minutes…in spite my very best seasoned efforts at prompting a direction towards some resolution i can foster...because they don't even know what books are out there to be read…and they are so used to silence…and all they know is they want to escape into some idea of a world that is not their lonely own. i do everything…from talking down the sometimes irate, often intelligible who can't understand why they don't have the book they ordered yesterday…when it takes time sometimes to order it…wait for the courier…process it…bag it and run it through the postage machine…send it out with the postman…and wait for that indecipherable mystery to deliver it to their door — to — the ordering and processing and shelving and pulling of books and the unbagging of mail and rebagging of mail and the writing and mass-mailing of newsletters and the loading up of crates and the planning of routes and the driving to deliver huge collections of books for people at nursing homes and jails and treatment centers and veteran's hospitals and rehab facilities and alternative schools and everywhere else people require a slice of free thought with which to broaden the otherwise limited horizon of their minds.

and days when, every patron may call yelling…and not just because, on the other end of the line, even i can hear the feedback on their hearing aides, i remind myself that i do what i do by reading this:


Alphabet

One by one
the old people
of our neighborhood
are going up
into the air

their yards
still wear
small white narcissus
sweetening winter

their stones
glisten
under the sun
but one by one
we are losing
their housecoats
their formal phrasings
their cupcakes

When I string their names
on the long cord
when I think how
there is almost no one left
who remembers
what stood in that
brushy spot
ninety years ago

when I pass their yards
and the bare peach tree
bends a little

when I see their rusted chairs
sitting in the same spots

what will be forgotten
falls over me
like the sky
over our whole neighborhood

or the time my plane
circled high above our street
the roof of our house
dotting the tiniest
"i"


- naomi shihab nye

la huitième semaine - 18e chose.web-based apps. zoho and google docs.

alrighty, cruising right along on my list of 23 things. this is actually my 2nd post using the publish option of zoho writer. [the first was le bon mot: hazrat inayat khan] and i have to say, i lurve the concept of a web-based, software-less word processing site. i can see this coming in great handy when i go back to school in the fall.

there.

i said it.

now i'm committed to making it happen.

ahhh-men.

ps. it helps when publishing from zoho to know how your website font is formatted. i'm a stickler for the details.

la septième semaine - 17e chose. PBCLS sandbox wiki.

well then, i've been to the PBCLSwiki sandbox, and left my footprints firmly planted there. it was interesting to see what all of my co-workers favorite favorites were...as instructed, i posted my blog. and found the other 2 easiest sections to post in were favorite restaurants [i love to eat] and animals. *a disclaimer: if i had attempted favorite music, i fear i would have derailed the whole train...my list would have been ex-ten-sive.*

feel free to take a visit and see what i - and my coworkers - are up to when we are not at work. people who know me will automatically know which favorites are mine. care to take a guess?

la septième semaine - 16e chose. wikis.

i like wikis. i like saying wikis. but if i had to laud my most favorite thing about wikis, it'd be how downright egalitarian they are.

again. mr. thomas paine comes to mind with his ideal of a society in which people have a right to express their own opinions, even if they incite controversy...in his perfect world, the presses would be the voice of the populace...his is an argument for free speech, and the web certainly helps the reality of such exchange to happen.

but back to our wiki assignment: i like the prospect of using wikis as an interactive database. it's a brilliant forum for reader's advisory. see: library goddesses. i also liked that some of the libraries had different wikis for use in customer service: like the memphis public library's "staff language skills" for non-english speaking patrons. what a great way for staff/patrons alike to compile any individual expertise in different hobby wikis like this one for cooking found on the St. Joseph County Public Library's wiki. i know, i for one, can't wait to contribute to a section on my favorite sport: extreme ironing

the five o' clock whistle did blow.

waiting. waiting. waiting out the rain.

[to go home]



still,

cycling to work is such a joy.



for anyone wondering if they really could do it.

just - do it.



any inconvenience [such as rain] or legitimate worries [such as bad drivers] become just another part of your routine.

all i can say is...

...i love friends who come back to work
to pick up my bicycle-riding-stranded self
in the midst of a late-afternoon thunderstorm,
and who treat me to homemade
chickpea flour pizza before making sure
i'm delivered home safe and dry.

[i am truly a fortunate girl]

[7:44:00 am to Orual via text:]

"Right now i'm thinking. What was I thinking?!"

I was about a mile from work at that point. and the truth was, it really was a beautiful! morning for my first commute by bike. In all, the nearly 9 mile route was far easier on a weekday-workaday than on a Sunday.

Even though I awoke at my usual time - 5:45 - my morning routine was entirely different. Used to timing my day by the various [and repeat] segments on NPR's Morning Edition, I quickly realized I need to develop a new rhythm. What interesting behaviors we embrace as humans. For instance: I know that unless I reach a certain intersection by a certain time, then I will catch the red light. And therefore catch a subsequent 4 red lights on my entire route to work by car. But by bike: The rhythm is entirely different.

So too are the sailor signs. You know the way you watch the skies to know what to anticipate? Here's what I've learned in the last 24 hours by bike:

The whole universe may seem mired in a still, sticky heat as complicating to movement as Jello, but when you are pedaling that last 4 mile homestretch to work by bike…don't let the stilled trees fool you. you will be riding against the wind the whole way.

In spite of this, I made it to work…and an half-an-hour early!...only moderately drenched in sweat.

I had lain awake for three hours until nearly 2 in the morning buzzing [was it an exercise euphoria from my Sunday ride?] through thoughts of what to anticipate and what to pack.

Packing for a bike commute, it's helpful to embrace your inner boy scout and consider every possibility to BE PREPARED. I am wholly a novice. And when I couldn't sleep I read through a couple chapters of The Complete Idiots Guide to Cycling to go through some of the checklists of provisions I'll need to acquire.

What I did not have to pack is:
A repair kit.
A portable pump.
New tubes.
Raingear.
Any suitable baskets or panniers.

But starting small, what I was able to do was: In one backpack and a small pocketed messenger bag I packed:

-all wrapped in plastic inside my packpack-

My current read: "Soulmates" by Thomas Moore
My journal and pen
My wallet with ID [for you, mum]
2 bananas; an apple; 2 granola bars; 2 fruit bars [no…I am not a major snacker…I have diabetes and must make every effort to consider an episode of low blood sugar…especially while exercising]
My diabetic glucometer
A injection site change for my insulin pump
My hair products and brush [to alleviate the inevitable 'helmet head']
An extra stainless steel water bottle filled with ice cold h2o

-wrapped in plastic inside the messenger bag-

A towel, washcloth and soap [for making myself presentable to my coworkers]
My deodorant
My workclothes
A change of shoes
My Second current read:"Man and his Symbols" by Carl Jung

[it should be fairly obvious by the necessary inclusion of 2 books that i'm the fairly bookish type. EVERY thing you pack is weight. And a backpack is PRIME real estate when it requires physical effort to make every mile]

By 7, I was on the road…with my messenger bag bungeed to my back rack on top of my Kryptonite U-lock.

The roads were remarkably quiet the first half of the trip with the occasional car and a few startled, sleepy dogwalkers.

I definitely need a bell/horn…not that they do any good for a clueless or aggressive driver, but a delightful ring-ring has to work better to alert a wandering sidewalker than my attempts at speaking louder than my usual soft tone by announcing my presence with an, "Excuse me…excuse me…ex-cuuuse me. Thank you!" [and smile: important].

I've also learned that garbage cans and recycling bins put out to the curb can ruin your flow when you have to screech to a halt to make it between them and a concrete lightpost.

So, by 7:30 I'm well on my way and more than half-way to work and enjoying the sounds of the morning birds…something I'd totally miss by car.

I learned the best way around the tricky roundabout and even commiserated about the already sweltering heat with a fellow velo-commuter who was riding her bike to the Tri-rail station…I imagine she was on her way to work. I think in today's economy, we are going to see more people taking public transport…provided it will still be provided in the throes of our state's budget cuts.

I practiced spinning instead of mashing…for development of those very defined calf muscles I used to have as a child [now incredibly hot as an adult].

And when I got to work, I felt exhilarated at what I'd accomplished! 10 minutes washing up in the ladies room, and nobody could've suspected I'd wheeled my way to work by the sweat of my brow [ I asked a work friend, just to be sure ]

There certainly is an exercise euphoria…release of endorphins, and all…my mum the marathoner talks about it all. the. time. Because, even though I watched the afternoon clouds roll in with some consternation, I could not wait to get back on my bike. And I did watch the skies…again…for sailor signs. The rain looked frightening…and like it was going to be around for a good, long time. But thankfully, the universe smiled on me…and though it was dark and cloudy…3 people actually called me while I was en route to make sure I wasn't riding in the rain…the roads were entirely dry by the time I rode home, and the wind and rain held out until I made it there.

The most important thing I think I've learned however is, it is so much easier to simply Do.
The hardest part is wondering if you can.

semaine, deux - 4ème chose - blog nombre un.

it's been a long, long time since i've been assigned homework.

i was the quintessential nerd.

i cut the libraried-strong arms of my bookish frame by toting home esoteric texts on edible wild plants, dying languages, and traditional peoples all o'er the world, for easy reading by the time i was 12.

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more often caught reading in a corner at school or staying late after hours to edit the highschool yearbook

[the principal actually gave me a master key to lock-up campus my junior year] than getting in any real trouble, it's finally nice to find myself granted the room and space to pursue my inquisitive diversions professionally.

which brings me to the point of this first posting. i have been prescribed to share my thoughts on this new program my workplace has instituted to usher the bastion of library workers in our system into the 21st century and vagaries of web 2.0.

we have been given the missive of completing certain exercises each week toward the goal of becoming more and more proficient with a virtually submerged society. for those without geek credentials [like myself] the incentive for trying [who needs incentive -really- when given the opportunity to play while at the office? but, i digress.] is the opportunity to win a laptop. not such a bad motivation. eh? but what really makes me happy is...the chance at least, for a little while to really - with official sanction - broaden my horizons here at work.


lesson one: Your first post should be on how you feel about the Seven and 1/2 Habits of Highly Successful Lifelong Learners from week 1; discuss what you feel will be the most difficult part for you and why?

7 ½ Habits of Highly Successful Lifelong Learners

Habit 1: Begin with the end in mind
Habit 2: Accept responsibility for your own learning
Habit 3: View problems as challenges
Habit 4: Have confidence in yourself as a competent, effective learner
Habit 5: Create your own learning toolbox
Habit 6: Use technology to your advantage
Habit 7: Teach/mentor others
Habit 7 ½: Play

The above is our directive. i've attended countless scores of workshops on methods in the workplace. some relevant. some simply passed my time. but i have to say. these pointers are geared to a specific end, but they're not a far cry from the days i'd beg my mum to take me to the library where i'd while away an afternoon in the stacks committing to some now dusty hall of my memory how to quick-build a forest lean-to or how idioms and guestures vary wildly among cultures and geographic locations. i've always burgeoned with wonder.

habits 1 and 2 are innate in this bird.

habit 3 was instilled in me young by my honestly optimistic mother
[and plenty life-opportunities to take the high road].

habits 4 and 5 develop naturally like muscle memory everytime you fall off a bike.

habit 6 takes a small bit of work in our brave new [virtual] world - especially when you are a luddite by nature [i've been told i'm a quick study, however].

habit 7, i've employed in my work-a-day world. but often, wonder if given the opportunity, just how good a mentor i could be.

it's habit 71/2, i most appreciate. and the one i find hardest to actually commit to.

it's the one i imagine won't come easily to most of us engaged in this activity...having sadly been conditioned to function as efficient drones for assigned functions. but the one which ultimately can lead us into real growth and real learning.

None other than Albert Einstein, after all, called play “the highest form of research.”